A Little Play Goes a Long Way
- Irene Feher
- May 30
- 8 min read
I started out musically as an improviser, in fact we all do, and in our own way. As a child I made up songs and put on shows for my family. My parents thought I was cute and funny. It was when I sought guidance from my mother, and then my uncle who was a professional singer that my self doubts started to shut me down. My mother tried to harmonize with me, but she could not understand why I couldn’t harmonize like she and her siblings did so naturally as children. My uncle was blunt, he said he wasn’t sure I had what it takes to be a great singer and that I should consider something like interior decorating instead. That was not enough to shut down my desire to sing, so he worked with me. When I sang out of tune, I was immediately corrected. When I couldn’t find the starting note, sing a chord or a harmony note, he didn’t know what to do, and the more the adults tried to correct me, the more I froze up. Eventually I would drop into a state of panic, and freeze. Sometimes it would happen right in the middle of a song - I would get lost. What puzzled them is that when things did work - it sounded good.
I practiced a lot on my own. I found some teachers and mentoring musicians who were very encouraging. I started to get it! I started playing in bands and I became a master of what I could do.
I began studying classical voice at the age of 24. I could listen to singers and mimic their phrasing and expression. My first teacher recognized that natural ability but I carried a lot of tension in my body. She was very encouraging. But there was another problem: because of low vision and a condition known as dyspraxia, I am naturally clumsy, so again, I had to work extra hard to conform to the aesthetics of classical performance. In retrospect, I could have been an excellent comedian, a Fanny Brice of sorts.
Determined to become an accomplished singer, I practiced a lot. I worked on my stage comportment. My ten thousand hours have paid off, and now I sing in many different styles with the ease and flexibility I always longed for. I have also learned a great deal about somatic education and motor skill acquisition. I have also learned about the emotional motor system, which is how the brain translates emotions into physical actions, especially those we perform instinctively or without conscious thought.
I ask myself: what would I have wanted from my mother and uncle? I would have wanted more encouragement and joyful play. I wished they could have met me where I was and built on what I had.
How? Using vocal games such as: you sing a note, I will sing it back; you sing a note and I will mirror you with my voice or instrument; let’s siren together; let’s play with this phrase; let’s move with this phrase; let’s go to the piano and make up songs; let’s drum together.
What would I have wanted from my classical training? I wish I would have had the opportunity to improvise so I could explore and develop aural skills before literal skills. I wish I could have moved more to find my natural grace. I wish I could have been allowed to find myself in music.
Long story short, returning to improvisation in an environment where there are no wrong notes, allowed me to free up my voice and deepen my musicality. This was because I was able to experiment without fear and I was encouraged by my mentors.
Developing musical and vocal skills is a holistic process where the physiological, psychological, social and emotional aspects must be considered. It’s not a one size fits all formula. Improvisation allows us to meet each other. In the process we communicate who we are and our desired learning outcomes through music. When a human being feels seen and respected for who they are, they have the opportunity to grow. Conforming to one aesthetic set of principles can be stifling.
When I feel comfortable, I am more receptive, and I learn better. We have to find the style of learning that works best for us, and that may change over the course of a lifetime of learning.
Another Wonderful Improvisation Retreat at CAMMAC!
Last weekend I hosted my third annual Music for People Improvisation Retreat at CAMMAC. It is intended as an opportunity to come together in improvised music. In 2023, it was a dream come true for me, last year it was a step towards creating an annual gathering of heart centered musical play, and here we are!
It’s already on the calendar for May 22-25 2026!
I hope you consider joining us!
Our weekend featured workshops facilitated by long-time and more recent members of our community. All are committed to the philosophy and forms of MfP which they have integrated with their individual expertise and work. The activities this year featured piano improvisation, musical conversations, singing circles, improvisation workouts, embodied musical practice through movement, poetry, jamming our favorite songs and pop/rock genres, healing work sound with tuning forks, vocal toning and sound bath. We played in large and small ensembles surrounded by nature. We continued to jam out songs we love in the evenings. We laughed, we talked, we reconnected and made new connections with others and ourselves.
I was honored and thrilled to host the weekend with Mary Knysh, Jim Oshinsky, Alison Weiner, Jahna Moncrief, Josée Allard, and Carl Chimi, as well as Sam Dignan and Lana Turner, two local trainees in Music for People’s Musicianship Leadership Program. It takes a village to make a retreat like this work, and my heart is full of gratitude for all who came from near and far to be with us!
I want to get to the heart of what we do because It’s so much more than learning to improvise. It is about what music teaches us!
Upon Arrival we ask participants the following questions:
Why were you inspired to come?
How is music a part of your life?
What are you hoping to take away and experience?
Here are some of the answers we received:
Infusion of inspiration
Let go of faking and fear
Be open to what is here
Feel free!
Try new styles of music
Sing and play simultaneously
Trust fingers and body intuition
Going deeper into something familiar
“Me” in silence
Be connected
Play in duets and trios
More musical magic
Expand my playing repertoire
Take risks
Find the wrong note
Swim and tap into resiliency
More trust in self and others
Hear and support the shy folks
Brave vulnerability
Spaciousness and slowness
Repetition
Have fun
Enjoy joy
It seems as though we fulfilled our mission. Here are some informal testimonials that were recorded:
"I’ve met so many great people and we have had so many heart to hearts."
"Exquisite quality of music and people - we don’t have to translate to each other here, we are together. I have learned that I can sing and play drums together. This is perfect for my brain, body and heart. I found more depth and precision with my playing."
"Weekend of great healing. It’s wonderful to be a group of such kind and generous people and just be in music. Not only music but humanity. I don’t need to take myself so seriously and not everything I do is a “make or break” situation. If I don’t have all the answers, I can look to other people and through that connection just do it and not obsess over it, just do it."
"This is so much more than music. Music is a way in - but I am grateful for the hugeness of the holding of us in the community not just in music but in who we are."
"There is so much beauty that is right there and we could just access it. There was a moment where we were just singing and playing the piano and so much beauty emerged. I just want to be in more beauty."
"It gave me more things to think about when I improvise."
"I got to experience what Music for People really is. To share in the beauty and creation in the moment that we can all take a hold of. I am grateful to also be able to see myself in these contexts which is what we do in this work."
"The connections I’ve made are so powerful. It was a beautiful and nourishing experience."
"I am really grateful that I can come from far away and just drop back into an activity that I have been doing for many years and don’t get to do so often, it feels so good to come right back in."
"We can all connect to each other through this simple creative play together."
"I like that we call it a community. There are sometimes feelings of “I’m not worthy to be here with these musicians who know so much more than I do” but I found that I could mesh myself in and take chances. The silences are opportunities to stay back and let people shine. I’m here with fellow jammers and I am grateful that we all have a similar way of thinking about music and how it brings people together."
"My goal was to have fun. This was a buffet for my brain because of the people and all the fun things we did."
"Beautiful energy. The patience, smiles and encouragement of the facilitators and players."
I am so grateful for how alike and how different we all are, and we create a community with that. I’ve long been thinking of being too much for the people around me, but this is a place where I don’t feel that. There are arms to hold us when we go out to that very edge and there is something greater than each one of us that we can come back to. It’s life changing, it changed my life when I first found this work, and every time I come and meet new people, it changes me more in really beautiful ways.
This work lives on for so many years. I am grateful that you are all here keeping this work alive. I think it changes the world.
One breath, gratitude and the importance of community.
My favorite moment was the first night doing the duets and feeling incredibly safe doing that
Feeling intimidated by more experienced musicians? We need to assure you that we ALL feel that, and our confidence only grows when we give ourselves the opportunity, the chance to just do it.
In the beginning I wanted to go deeper into something familiar, and one of the things that I did was sing poetry I had written accompanied by someone at the piano. Playing with a musician who doesn’t know my poetry but who is so sensitive and aware accompanying me is amazing. It just flowed.
My takeaway is that our stories are not what’s present. They are not real. And to Notice when there is a story, and then let it go in favor of what’s actually happening and the relationships that are actually happening and who people actually are.
The community really supported me on several endeavors. I learned how to play in a horn section, which has been a dream ever since I started. You can add contrast to a piece by just stepping back and enjoying what is going on in a piece and that was just fine. It was really nice.
To trust my feeling and my thinking when I play or take risks in music. I forget that many times and it is good to be reminded.
I want to continue putting in more risks.
One of the most fun things was accompanying the brass section. I had decided the first night that I would just play. This is such a beautiful piano. I can get mad at myself when I find myself just playing on the surface of notes and that just changed the next day because I was playing. It was all coming out on piano and drums - all my music.
2025 CAMMAC Retreat Photo Gallery
Thank you to Laura Chan for capturing these beautiful images!
